Spouse Spending Habits - Separation In Order?

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I want to figure out how to completely dissociate MY money from my husband's money, outside the shared expenses that we incur as a result of our must-haves (mortgage, car, daycare, groceries, etc.) Basically, I'm a saver, and he's a spender, and every attempt I've made to try to alert him to his spendthrift ways has been useless.

I'm working on this idea now, with respect to figuring out what each of us *must* contribute to the house hold, but I was wondering whether you would know if it's possible to completely separate myself and my credit from his? I've got great credit, and a really low debt/income ratio; he has good credit, but with his spending habits, his debt is bound to increase slowly. I want to make sure that, regardless of how he manages HIS money, I can't be touched by his creditors/credit rating.

There isn't a need for either of us to co-sign or be a co-applicant on any mortgage, or other loan, so we never have...but does not being named on his stuff protect me from it?

- Mandi

Comments(5)

  • InActive_Account17th September, 2004

    I'm not worried about a lack of credit history, as I have/have had various mortgages, equity lines, car loans, etc., in my own name. I merely meant that I don't require my husband's credit, nor he mine (to date, at least), to qualify for loans.

    We do have 3 accounts, not including savings, set up exactly as you mentioned. That's all well and good, but it's not the liquid stuff that concerns me. I want to find out whether, if my husband drives himself into a bad financial spot, it's possible my own credit and/or purchasing power could be affected. Also, I want to make sure that I'm protecting my own assets from his lack of fiscal responsibility.

    -Mandi

  • Dumdido17th September, 2004

    Frogger,
    You make marriage sound like a bussiness arangment. It's not, and the fact that many people think like that contributs greatly to the divorce rate that is now over 50%.
    Don't marry someone unless you are sure you can accept all parts of them. In marriage you are united into one flesh that in the eyes of God can not be seperated.

    My wife and I put all of our monthley income into one account for the two of us. We both then get a weekly 'allowance' that is ours to do with whatever we want. Beyond that we agrea that we won't spend any money unless we both agrea to it.
    When we were first married my wife spent way more money then we were bringing in. Our 'allowance" is a system that we came up with that has made a tremendous difference.

    Mandi -
    There are legal entities that can be set up to shelter your money and investments from him - but your not doing your marriage any good. Deal with the problem between the two of you instead of trying to find a way around it.

  • kenmax17th September, 2004

    sounds like you have deeper problems than money management , maybe marriage counseling is in order........km

  • flacorps17th September, 2004

    His credit shouldn't be able to affect your credit unless you live in a community property state or are joint on a credit obligation.

    That being said, being authorized user on any of his cards may cause reporting to your CRA reports.

    Further, I have seen cases where a credit card was improperly reported to a spouse's CRA report even where she was not joint or AU on the card. Fortunately it wasn't doing any harm and the issuer agreed readily to fix it.

  • bnorton17th September, 2004

    Mandi,

    Everyone in here is correct. I have no experience with the laws in community property states, but in general if you are not an authorized user, co-signer, or otherwise part of his account, his habits should not affect you. One suggestion I would make is to check your credit if you haven't recently to ensure you are indeed not on his accounts.

    I am not going to touch the marriage thing. You know where you are better than any of us do. My wife and I run into rough times sometimes, and most of the time it is because we are too busy to communicate. When we sit down to really discuss things, it gets better.

    If your husband is open to new ideas, you may get a friend of his to give him Rich Dad Poor Dad, and The Millionaire Next Door. If you do it he probably won't read it. If someone else does he might if he is a reader.

    Good luck.

    Bruce..

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