Annoying Neighbor Stories
Somewhere on this website (can't remember which forum) there was a post about interesting items found in rehabs. I enjoyed reading those, and thought it would be interesting to hear stories about snoopy/pain in your a$$et neighbors at your rental properties.
I'll start. These did not happen directly to me, but to another rental property owner friend of mine.
1. My friend got a call one morning from an older lady, and she said, obviously very distraught that they would be doing this, "Your tenants were up at 3:00 in the morning, their lights were on, and I think they had girls over!" My friend simply asked if they were being loud, to which she replied no. So he asked how she knew they were up at 3:00, and she said that she was up too. So he asked her why she could be up at 3:00 and not making any noise, but they could not be up at 3:00. That shut her up.
2. Another "neighborly neighbor" called my friend, to inform him that the leaves from his trees were falling into his yard. So my friend simply responded, "Well I think your leaves are falling into MY yard!" And that shut him up!
I think this post will not only be humorous, but could prove to be very educational as well. Keep them coming!
I would have to say most of the nieghbors were pretty descent to my brother and I. But the one house we were rehabbing the nieghbor next door was renting and wanted to buy our property. She looked around and definitely wanted it. We thought, Great! Well, she had horrible credit, no money and a part time job. So we figured ...NOT! But...she was HOT! And she liked my brother who was single. Well, little by little my brother would disapear...where did he go. Oh, he was helping move the refridgerator in her place...Oh and looking at the bathroom floor that needed repair. So by the end of rehabbing this home, I was the guy in the beer commercial taking one for his buddy. I put in about 50 to 60 more hours than he did and he got a little ...lucky.
P.S. - Yes, I definitely made sure that deal didn't go down 50/50. But it was worth the trade to him.
We used to single rooms to people on the third floor of our house. Paul was a pot smoking computer programer student. Elroy was a very devote baptist. Paul would use a space heater to keep warm in the winter when he would spend hours working on the computer. Elroy would use the toaster and the combination of the toaster and the space heater would blow the circut and Paul would loose any unsaved computer stuff. This got Paul very upset. Paul complained and we all agreed that Elroy would ask Paul to turn off the heater before using the toaster. Problem is he never ever asked. Paul became so upset after weeks of regualar circut blowings that he then threatend Elroy "THE NEXT TIME YOU BLOW THE CIRCUT THAT TOASTER IS GOING OUT WINDOW". That night Elroy came down crying "He smashed my toaster!! He smashed my toaster!!"
All I could do was laugh.
Many long years ago, I designed and built an A frame house in the hills of Hollywood on a little upslope street called Holly Place.
It was most unusual as it was a true A frame and actualy hung from the support beam then tapered toward the ground. I loved it and I built it with unemployed actors who all trained on the site. When I say train, that is what I mean. Some of them I am sure had never seen a hammer before much less something so advanced as a tape measure.
You did not want to go near the place at noontime. All the actors were heavy into strange thick smokes, grown I believe in the near by hills. You could get a contact high just by looking at the site.
But we did it, even pulling the two story A's up with a jury pole and pulleys and ropes.
The lot was of course in keeping with my means in those days, unbuildable as the main water line that supplied hollywood came down thru the lot and we had to encase it in concrete with proper engineering, imbeded steel etc. It was the kind of impossible site that only a stark raving idiot would build on. But having no money or much talent and really keen on erecting this most unusual example of a set of hands pointing to god, I did it.
My first tenant moved in a young actress of Tahitian descent and all was wonderfull.
About two weeks latter I get a call from a neighbor to come at once a man is beating up the young girl. So I dash up the hill and run to the front door to be met by the biggest human being I have ever seen in my life. He is about 6ft 5 inches and heavy about 300 lbs. He is carrying the girl who is screaming and yelling. I confront him muster my courage and say, "Ok thats enough drop the lady and take your medicine!" Hoping he had a cough or something that asprin would cure. This giant looks at me and damn, he drops the girl. Well I wind up. I hit him in the middle of his tummy, I snap my wrist with a perfect twisting follow thru. Just like a text book punch.
Nothing happens, his eyes buldge a bit but nothing more. There is a moment of silence, my terror is overpowering.
"Lucius is my name," I say, sticking out my hand in total friendship, "I want to be your friend cus if I don't your going to tear my head off." He stands there looking down at me, all of a sudden a smile comes over his face, he sticks out his hand we shake. "You crazy little man," he say,"You could have hurt me, I dont think. Come on we go for drink and leave mad sister here." So away we go. We drank most of the night. I bought of course just happy to be alive, cause this giant of a Taihitian could have destroyed me with one blow.
Moral of this story, Never hit a big 6 ft 5 inch Taihitian. You could get hurt, or spend a lot of money on booze.
Be smart, use a club, a really big one.
Luicus
One of the Mobile Home Parks I had was the center hub for all the drug trade in the area. I cleaned it up and met a lot of local undercover police, ATF, and DEA while I was there. This was just after the 9/11 inceident and I lived in Venice(where they trained) so paranoia reined supreme in both work and home life at the time. My manager had moved in a nice couple (so I thought) with a newborn. We cut them a break on the rent to try and get a nicer class of people into the park. The guy that lived there tended to be a little quirky, by wearing black BDU pants and t-shirts most of the time, but they looked comfortable so I didnt give it any thought.
During the same time my maintenance man was making extra money as a paid informant for the feds, something my manager helped set up. Later I found out that it was just to help his own drug habit.
He comes to me after a couple of months with a wad of cash saying this guy has made him a bundle selling ilegal guns and homemade stuff out of the park. My handyman couldnt keep a secret to save his life.
My jaw dropped I couldnt believe we moved this nice family in. Then he goes on to tell me that not only is he selling them, he has set up his own testing range, lab, Automatic conversion setup, and inside the mobile we are renting him. He also had the nerve to ask me to rent him another one as his operation was getting to big for just one mobile.
I decided to set up surveillance and decline the second mobile. I told the handyman he was going to be kicked out because I didnt want him blowing up my park. The handyman then begged me to let it go on as the ATF was closing in on him and he was going to be buying a 90 lb home made bomb. His main reason was he would lose his second source of income. We talked it over and it would take me 30 days to evict, so that was his deadline to arrest the guy and get him out of there. He did so on the 29 day mark. The park was surrounded by ski masked feds, just as I got there for my weekly meeting with the manager. What a sight.
Come to find out he had also booby trapped the place. His girlfriends kid was his brothers child, and those two left because his brother was apparantly too dangerous. He was sleeping with his nephews mother, I should have called jerry springer.
The feds ended up getting the 90 lb bomb, a lot of modified guns, modified bullets( cop killers), bomb making stuff and for spite a 1/4 oz of marijuana.
It made the local news. His girlfriend sold him out and ended up with a pimp, nuff said. It took 3 grand in un modifying the mobile back to a rentable unit, and about 3 months for everyone to stop associating the park with gun crazed lunatics.
After the park switched hands the new owner ( a real winner lol) has let it go back to a drug park and it will more than likely be foreclosed on, given the 50% vacancy rate. Glad I got out when I did. But on the same note I would buy it back and do it again for the money. I made a bundle. Not really a neighbor story, but something I figured everyone would get a kick out of.
Kyle
Funny stuff! Any others?
Pretty Cool story Kyle.